[ Jin Ling shakes his head quickly and he presses both hands to his face and takes some deep breaths. Why did he have to humiliate himself already? But he got himself under control and wiped at his face again before finally looking at the other. ]

Nothing's wrong.

[ But that ... wouldn't suffice. ]

I just could never imagine what your smile was like or your voice or anything.

[ he does reach for his sword, the sword that matched the one that Jin Zixuan had as well. His fingers grasp at it the way he does whenever he's trying to calm himself down, though he stops short of clutching the sword like he's hugging it. ]

And you're nothing like Jiujiu or ... [ there's a little hardness when he adds.. ] Xiao Shushu. I don't know how...

[ And then he realizes how honest he's being and how much he admitted so he snaps his mouth shut and sets his jaw. ]