that's not the shape of my heart

[lyingheart]

It's been three months since the last time we did one of these, so without further ado, after some coding tweaks, I give to you... a Mask or Menace Heart Meme!

SUGGESTED USE
1. Post a blank comment for your character.
2. Reply to other people's blank comments with your character's hearts to their character! This can be IC, or can be OOC.
3. This is a mobile friendly heart meme, which means no hovertext! Customize your hearts with the text included in the code for each heart instead.
4. ???
5. PROFIT!

❤ "I love you, or could fall in love with you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #FF9999;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I love you, or could fall in love with you."</span></div>	❤ "You're my family." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #FF0000;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"You're my family."</span></div>	❤ "I would kill for you, or sacrifice myself for you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #990000;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would kill for you, or sacrifice myself for you."</span></div>
❤ "I would like to/have enjoyed kissing you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #FF99CC;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would like to/have enjoyed kissing you."</span></div>	❤ "I would like to/have enjoyed having sex with you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #F660AB;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would like to/have enjoyed having sex with you."</span></div>	❤ "I would date you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #FF3399;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would date you."</span></div>
❤ "I would flirt with you/have flirted with you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #FFFF00;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would flirt with you/have flirted with you."</span></div>	❤ "I would hug you, or hold your hand." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #FFCC00;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would hug you, or hold your hand."</span></div>	❤ "I respect you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #FF6600;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I respect you."</span></div>
❤ "I would spend time, have fun, or be friends with you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #99FF66;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would spend time, have fun, or be friends with you."</span></div>	❤ "You are my friend." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #33CC33;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"You are my friend."</span></div>	❤ "I would rescue you or fight by your side." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #006600;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would rescue you or fight by your side."</span></div>
❤ "WTF I don't even?! You confuse me!" <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #00FFFF;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"WTF I don't even?! You confuse me!"</span></div>	❤ "You amuse me." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #0099FF;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"You amuse me."</span></div>	❤ "I'd like to get to know you better." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #0000CC;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I'd like to get to know you better."</span></div>
❤ "I would tease and/or make fun of you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #9999FF;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would tease and/or make fun of you."</span></div>	❤ "You frustrate or annoy me." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #CC66FF;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"You frustrate or annoy me."</span></div>	❤ "You frighten or unsettle me." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #9900FF;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"You frighten or unsettle me."</span></div>
❤ "I would use/manipulate you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #B6B6B4;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would use/manipulate you."</span></div>	❤ "I would physically or emotionally hurt you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #837E7C;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would physically or emotionally hurt you."</span></div>	❤ "I would kill you." <div style="width:300px; text-align:center;"><span style="font-size: 16pt; color: #000000;">❤</span><br><font style="font-size: 10px;">"I would kill you."</span></div>

Comments

[doneproperly]

It kind of is if you're Mandrake because he has no genuine friends and doesn't really even know how to have them. Only people he wants things from and people who want things from him and people he's allied with because they have a shared investment in something...

So. This is new and weird and different.

[lyingheart]

Does that mean we're making dinner one of these nights #how to friend by awkward people

[doneproperly]

Yes definitely

Before Annie came over he was kind of just like "ugh cooking takes up too much time i could be spending doing other things i'll just spend all my expendable income on buying pre-made food"

but now tHE GAME IS ON!!

Totally gonna master cooking. You wait.

[lyingheart]

She has zero complaints if it means she gets to eat whatever comes out of it UNLESS IT'S SUPER DAIRY OR... SPICY

Her tolerances are so low /face in hands

look your wallet will also thank you in the end John its like a service and not just being ultra competitive for some reason!

[hackitude]

HAHA YES. MORE MONEY TO SPEND ON RIDICULOUSLY TIGHT-FITTING SUITS.

Also please he's been brought up in a super British whitebread environment, his palate is super bland.

[lyingheart]

ugly laughter AT LEAST THEY'LL MAKE MUTUALLY PALATABLE FOOD
one day get adventurous start slow and all

and wow that is not what
why are you
people and their clothes man

[hackitude]

Actual quote from canon though:

Mandrake wore his dark hair close in a military crop—a conscious innovation to honor the men and women still at war. It had been a successful gesture: spies noted that, among commoners, he was the most popular magician. His haircut had thus been mimicked by many others, while his dark suits had likewise inspired a brief vogue. He no longer bothered with a tie: the collar of his shirt was casually unbuttoned.

LIKE WHAT A TOOL, AM I RIGHT???

So actually regardless of icons he should really look more like this instead of Tom Sturridge with a bad haircut and an ill-fitting school uniform suit but pbs are hard and Nichloas Hoult doesn't actually play any roles where he looks like that.

[lyingheart]

left casually unbuttoned

YEAH SURE
WHATEVER MANDRAKE

and yes he sounds entirely like one GET BACK IN THE BOX

[hackitude]

Oh wait and there's also this from the second book, when he's three years younger (FOURTEEN! FOURTEEN!):

Being a keen observer, Nathaniel had soon perceived that among working magicians, appearance was an important factor in maintaining status. Shabby attire was frowned upon; indeed it was a sure-fire mark of mediocre talent. He did not intend to give this impression. With the stipend that he received from his department, he had bought a tight-fitting black drainpipe suit and a long Italian coat, both of which he considered dangerously fashionable. He wore slim, slightly pointed shoes and a succession of garish handkerchiefs, which provided an explosion of color across his breast. With this outfit carefully in place, he would walk around the Whitehall cloisters with a lanky, purposeful stride, reminiscent of some wading bird, clutching sheaves of paper in his arms.

you fucking child

[lyingheart]

he considered dangerously fashionable
help i'm laughing oh no
garish handkerchiefs
exploding colors on his chest
he's a bird


he'd a bird at fourteen hahaha

[doneproperly]

Nobody likes making fun of Nathaniel and his ridiculous white boy ridiculousness more than the author. Except possibly the eponymous demon Bartimaeus.

[lyingheart]

All is as it should be