etcelsior | [kill bill sirens]

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[kill bill sirens]

TEST DRIVE MEME

Considering apping into MASK OR MENACE? Want to dip your toes into the setting and get a feel of whether your character will fit into it? Or maybe you're just cruising and want to play around? Then you've come to the right place!

Pick any of the following scenarios below or feel free to make up your own, but don't be afraid to throw yourself at someone else's thread, either!

And remember to have fun!

01. Your memory might be a haze still and you might even feel frustrated or anxious by the sudden news that you are no longer in your own world and that the Porter scientists and military cannot send you back. You don't get a chance to linger long in the underground Porter lab, but something is clearly amiss; light patches on the floor indicate something else used to sit in that spot in the room. Parts of the wall, floor and the tables look recently refurbished -- something happened in here not too long ago.

You're ushered out quickly and then suddenly, you're enveloped in a faint blue blue light before you find yourself under the bright Floridian sun. Another soldier steps toward you with a smile, directing your attention to a car near a large gate. She mentions she'll be debriefing you soon, handing out a brown folder. You don't see the digital tattoo on your wrist, but it's quickly explained on your way over to the car as you realize there are other confused faces nearby, all holding files of their own.

02. According to the soldiers, a domestic terrorist attack is the reason why the cheery and small city of Heropa is still under some major reconstruction. For a small city, the amount of outside help called in for reconstruction and repairs has made it livelier than it normally is. Construction workers on coffee breaks wave to the most obvious looking imPorts, some will even salute you. "We couldn'a done away with those bastards if it weren't for good folk like you," they say.

Wherever you go, locals are pleasant and courteous enough, sometimes stepping forward to ask for a quick photo or autograph. Every now and then, however, anyone who is so obviously an imPort will find a local backing away from them nervously, pulling their child back with them before closing a door.

03. De Chima, Virginia, while it suffered some damage to its downtown area, never slowed down for a second. For a large city with a bustling population and booming economy, it's quieter than one would expect for it to be, too. If you're trying to avoid the awestruck crowds, you might be able to thanks to everyone ducking under umbrellas and buildings due to heavy rainfall today, provided you aren't letting it slip you're a newcomer to this world. If you're not exactly human-looking or wearing clothes that very much scream medieval ages (or distant future), sorry. There's a high chance the kids are going to crowd you in excitement.

Some locals seem less enthused to see you. They never make an approach, but they can be overheard scoffing and muttering something about cameras. "Who do they think they are?" or "I don't like it... it reminds me of the government corruption back in the eighties." What could they be talking about?

04. Maurtia Falls, Pennsylvania, has, as always, avoided any major or minor damages. Ask about the Hornets or the recent fights between imPorts and the locals will shrug. Don't get them wrong; they're glad those damn Hornets have been dealt with, but they don't want to discuss politics. Try asking the local imPort Ambassador. What's his name? Ryan? Revan? They don't offer any more information. Naturally for a big city, the people are somewhat aloof in nature. You might even notice the police are just the same, turning their heads the other way when two shady figures exchange fat wads of cash at the street corner. Did the police just drive away in their hovervehicle without bothering to observe what those two were up to? They sure did.

05. Nonah, North Carolina, is the liveliest of all cities. It's loud, busy and there's some kind of energy in the air that gets everyone buzzing with excitement. Anyone who they come to determine an imPort is bombarded with all sorts of offers; job offers, advertising gigs, spokesperson for advocating children stay in school, etc. Anything and everything! You name it. Shops offer discounts for food and clothing, whatever they need. People flock in droves with questions, but they all say the same thing. Thank you for your service to this country, Hero. You saved a lot of lives. Wow, feels great to be a hero, doesn't it?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

People don't offer things without expecting something in return.

[even though Lapis does explain herself, she doesn't seem to be particularly bothered by the response or the possibility that she may have hurt Terra's feelings. instead she simply tucks a clump of hair behind her ear and considers the proposal.]

But you can show me whatever you like, if you really want to. I...don't really know where I'm going.

[she seems a bit hesitant to admit this, but Lapis does need to face the facts. in her current situation she's almost completely directionless. even if Terra secretly wants her to flood Heropa and ride a tidal wave of terror all the way up the east coast, killing an hour or two with the girl is about the most concrete thing she has to focus on right now.]

People don't—whoa, whoa. [okay, that is not a healthy way to look at things. clearly Lapis has some problems. or maybe that's how it works on her planet. but that is definitely not how it works here. most of the time. anyway the point is that Terra isn't the kind of person who would earn someone's trust and then betray them at the last minute to serve a dark master with absolutely no regrets. anymore.]

I don't know if you just knew crappy people, but a lot of the time people just do nice things for other people because they want to. I'm as new here as you are, but I think I know more about this world. Minus all the... Cold War stuff. Anyway. [she shakes her head, then puts on a smile.] You never told me what other things you're interested in. Let's get you acclimated.

You must come from a very different earth.

[the observation is not so much bitter as it is...wistful. a little melancholy. she has nothing but contempt for this planet, but the idea of somewhere that includes random acts of compassion as the norm is a nice one to reflect on. she can't say that Homeworld really fits the bill any longer.]

And I don't...really have any interests. So you might as well pick whatever you want.

[this is accompanied by no small measure of regret, because it very clearly marks all of the time that she'd lost to that damnable mirror. anything she was vaguely interested in on this planet came from a single half day, and even then she wasn't the one giving directions. passivity would serve her well here.]

[Terra just shrugs.]

Not that different, I don't think. You seriously probably just met some really bad people. They're out there, don't get me wrong, but I don't know, I think people are generally pretty good. [she sounds really casual about the nature of humanity.]

Anyway, you like video games, right? I saw a GameStop a few blocks this way. [she faces the door and points to the left.] These are okay, but most of them are really old. Like, I think Tetris just turned 30. You should see what we've come up with since then.

[she starts extending her hand for Lapis to take, but thinks better of it almost immediately and just starts walking towards the door instead.] Come on, let's go!

[Lapis could mention here that her problem isn't really with humans so much as the entire planet itself, but she sees no point in clarifying. let Terra think whatever she wants to.

it's a wise move to withdraw that hand, because Lapis' instinctively move behind her at the mere implication of the gesture. she's done being physically led around, thank you very much. she does follow though, so. small victories.]

Thirty really isn't that long.

[not to a gem, at least. she can't imagine things having progressed that much in such a short span of time.]

Really?

[it's not super far, which is good. Terra's not sure she's interesting enough to carry a long conversation without something to distract Lapis. she opens the door of the arcade and starts looking around; the red and white sign is pretty clear even from this distance, and she starts leading the way again.]

I guess that makes sense. Who knows how long you live compared to humans? But 30 years is basically an eternity in technological terms. I hear there's this law about it, something like "technology doubles in performance every two years". And it's been going since the 70s. That's... what's two to the 20th? [being a teenage superhero doesn't leave much time for math classes.] Something big.

[Lapis seems a little more attentive now that they're out and in the city proper again. it's not strictly directed at Terra, to be fair, but she's looking around at the buildings and displays with a sort of restrained interest. it's a different perspective, seeing this from the ground.]

A little over a million. [sorry, was that a rhetorical question? gems aren't good at those.] I guess it's just a little difficult to imagine after you've seen what thousands of years can do.

[she doesn't mean to brag - in fact, she sounds a little lost over that fact. it's not something Lapis had ever wanted to experience for herself.]

So you're thousands of years old? You don't look much older than me. I guess that gem really does work wonders. [she looks back over her shoulder at Lapis and grins. she's really glad that this world is so interesting to her. it's nice to see somebody who's still interested in the little things.] I guess your planet must be, like, leaps and bounds ahead of ours. Probably making buildings with all kinds of alien materials. Like... space metal.

[look. sci-fi is Beast Boy's thing. video games are more her speed, and now that they're approaching the GameStop she can see various promotional posters for the latest shootyman games. also one about brightly colored squid girls and one about some dude in a hat with a folding saw. she moves closer to the window of the store.]

Whoa, check this one out! Looks like a free-for-all paintball game, except everybody's a squid. Oh my god, is their ink the paint? That's awesome.

We've always been ahead of this place.

[it's the only response Terra gets as they make their way over, and even then it's said a little absently. Homeworld had been lightyears ahead of Earth, and now it had passed her by as well. it was hardly something to dwell on.

her attention snaps back when they make it to the GameStop, if only out of obligation. she places her fingertips lightly against the window glass, staring in as if she's looking at a new exhibition at the zoo.]

I guess a place like this would likes game about the sea.

[you know, considering how much of it is covered in water. her own gaze is trending towards a little poster featuring some kind of vision-impaired spirit forest now.]

[she looks over at the game that grabbed Lapis' attention and nods approvingly to herself.]

I don't know if it's the sea so much as it is the team-based online multiplayer. The people making that game try to find ways to cut down on the trash talk online, but people are always going to find a way to rub their victories in each other's faces. [her expression fades a little.] For better or for worse. So, uh.

[probably not the best time to bring up the harsh reality of online gaming.]

Does your homeworld not have a lot of water, then? [she looks over sheepishly. yeah, she is not making engaging conversation.]

[she notices the sort of abrupt change of topic, but chooses (either through apathy or tact) not to comment on it. she knows more than a little about people engraving their triumphs into the memories of the defeated.]

Not as much as this planet. It's more...[she tilts her head to the side, eyebrows knitting as she tries to find a way to describe Homeworld. it's not long before she just gives up.]

I guess I don't know it well enough to say anymore.

Really?

[a lot of this doesn't really add up, but she's pretty sure she can do some of the math. her back straightens; she returns her full attention to Lapis instead of the games (that she can only afford to window shop for right now anyway).]

That would mean you've been away from your home planet for... [natural log of her species' relative lifespan times Lapis' planet's equivalent of Moore's Law, raised to the power of e, over 4π times 2τ, carry the six] A long time.

Sorry if I'm being too forward, but... you never wanted to come to Earth, did you?

What I wanted didn't matter.

[she moves in the opposite of Terra, shifting what little focus she'd been giving the other girl back to glaring blindly at the game posters. it is too forward, but at the same time, did it matter who knew? it wouldn't change anything, but Lapis would gladly scream about the wrongs done to her from the rooftops if it meant that someone would remember them. as if that would somehow magically make them matter any more than they did now.

her fist clenches at her side, nails digging into her skin almost without her noticing. no, none of that had been her choice.]

Everything always seems to come back to this place. I can't change that no matter what I do.

[oh, wow. this started out as, like, just a girl she wanted to get to know a little better and now Lapis is stirring up some unpleasant memories in Terra. who knew.]

I... [no, she's not going to say she understands. she doesn't know Lapis that well yet, and she probably doesn't, anyway. not all of it.] I guess it wouldn't change much if I asked what you want.

[she knows that Lapis isn't paying attention to her, but that doesn't stop the faint lines of sadness from showing up on her face. as far as she knows, Lapis just wants to be able to go home and stay there. but maybe it's the kind of question nobody ever bothered asking her.]

What I wanted doesn't exist anymore.

[so, no, it wouldn't change a goddamn thing. Lapis' expression softens as she speaks, the anger draining out in favor of melancholy. she'd only been asked it once before - thousands of years, only once - and at heart her desire remains the same. she wants to go home.

but Homeworld no longer has the capacity to be that refuge for her. it had shown no sympathy to her plight when she'd arrived, instead choosing to thrust her back into the war machine in order to crush a handful of pitiful rebels clinging to a dead cause. they cared as little for their own kind as the Crystal Gems did.

she sighs deeply, undoing her fist so that she can rest it on the glass. does her reflection look as lost as she's feeling? Lapis hopes not, for her own sake.]

And now...I don't know.

[Terra can't tell what's going on inside Lapis' mind, but she thinks she has a decent idea. she takes a quick look inside the store to make sure they're not getting any unwanted attention (they aren't, fortunately) then goes back to Lapis. she steps a little closer, but she's gotten the feeling Lapis isn't super huge on physical contact and doesn't reach out to touch her shoulder like she wants to.]

Lapis, I... I know you probably don't care a lot about what I have to say, because I'm a human and you're some kind of incredibly advanced alien, but for a long time, nobody really asked me what I wanted, either. They just wanted me on their team, and I don't know, maybe that would have been okay in the long run, but maybe I just wanted to be a normal girl with a normal life. The point is that nobody bothered asking me either.

[none of this is going to change anything. she already feels it. hell, she's expecting Lapis to just up and walk away at any minute. so why is she actually getting serious now, of all times? this has gone way beyond just thinking "hey, that blue girl is cute". she looks towards the store window, too, keeping her eyes on Lapis' reflection.]

So I don't know. Maybe you can just try to... live?

[it's difficult to tell, but Lapis is watching Terra through the glare of the glass. her shoulders draw in imperceptibly as the girls comes closer, but there is otherwise no outward reaction. she knows better than that now.

it's not surprising that someone else had suffered through a similar experience. what had happened to Lapis was hardly unique, and maybe that's what pricks at her the most - not even the events that had crushed her were worthy of note. the universe wasn't content with simply entrapping her, it seemed; it needed to erase her as well.]

Did they let you go?

[it's so hard to tell if Lapis is asking the question out of genuine interest or simply another offshoot of her own hurt. her voice is heavy despite the careful neutrality it's delivered with, betraying the tempest swirling below the surface.]

[ha. Terra focuses her eyes on her own reflection as memories flood her head. memories she thought she'd leave buried for a long time—but didn't she think the same of herself? and here she was. no longer the flag at the center of a tug of war she never wanted to be a part of. not even Terra anymore, really. maybe she should start using her own name again, she muses among all the other thoughts.]

I made them let go.

[she realizes she hasn't said anything for a moment and those are the words that come out first. without thinking about it, they come out angrier than any sentence she's said in years. looking at her own reflection, she discovers she's scowling. it feels justified towards both sides: towards one for things that still burned inside the darkest corners of her mind; towards the other for putting those corners there.]

You're lucky.

[she doesn't begrudge Terra that anger - can understand it well, if she cares to think back over uncaring faces she'd stared down in her recent past. there was no one to rely on but yourself, and it was a tenuous certainty at best; sometimes it took a violent shake to make people realize you weren't going to be used anymore.

as for herself, Lapis currently doesn't share in any of the nostalgic bitterness. her voice is the most withdrawn it's been during this entire conversation, bordering somewhere in the region of melancholy. she's not quite jealous that Terra had found that freedom for herself, but...it's close.]

Maybe.

[she almost wants to get lost in her thoughts so she can have an excuse to run away from the conversation, to seal up that stupid wall that her horrible past keeps leaking through. but she can't abandon Lapis here—in front of a GameStop in the middle of the city while Terra is having the second hardest conversation of her second life.]

You never really escape.

[shit. she hadn't wanted to say that, but the words bubbled up in her throat and before she could psyche herself out they just came pouring out. maybe it sounded like the right thing in her head. she breaks the lock-on with her reflection and notices, behind it, that people in black polo shirts inside the store are starting to stare.]

Anyway, um. Do you want to... I don't know, go somewhere else and talk about this stuff?

[she's expecting a no. there's no way Lapis could want to keep talking about this. but it's going to be on Terra's mind all day now anyway. might as well offer.]

We can go to the beach, if you like.

[she acquiesces, not because Lapis particularly cares to continue down this road but because it's easier in this situation to simply fold. she's learning (slowly) how much give is too much, and when to drift back into her tendency for passivity - and this is one of those times. it's easier to let Terra get this all out of her system and leave, rather than build up the possibility of being sought ought at a later date to finish what was started.

and it's not so bad, really. when they talk in abstractions like this she can skirt around the really hurtful details, like pressing on a bruise just hard enough to remind yourself of its existence. venting the anger just a little...maybe that's healthier.

she steps away from the display window without ever noticing the concerned employees within and begins to walk, moderately confident of her destination. Lapis still has no idea where specific places are, but her aerial scouting is enough to relocate big landmarks like the fucking ocean.]

And...it's not really about escaping. It's about being able to build your own prison.

[she turns slightly to make eye contact when she says this, the first time in a long stretch of this conversation. there's no reason for her to say it, but...she feels better for verbalizing it all the same. was that empathy? she can't remember anymore.]

I haven't been to the beach here yet.

[which she says very casually, like they're not in the midst of bringing up very vague, but very definite trauma from their respective pasts. she falls into step beside Lapis, glad to let her lead the way in more ways than one. Terra... no, Tara, Tara is better, Tara hasn't had a lot of time to talk about what happened to her, mostly because the only people who would believe her are the ones who did it to her. and she wants to let that wall break down entirely for Lapis, but she can't. she would drown.]

[the thought of building her own prison, though. that makes her laugh on the inside. once she feels ready to start talking around the point again, she jumps back into her serious voice, walking close (but not too close) to Lapis and keeping her voice quiet and level. she notices the eye contact and she's glad for it after an entire conversation with barely any of it. it kind of makes her feel like she can tell Lapis more than just metaphors.]

Been there, done that. [she means it like a joke but there's not a lot in her tone of voice to give that away.] All the self-help gurus I hear about say you shouldn't try to lock things away. You need to make them part of yourself instead. [she scoffs; now she isn't joking.] I call bull. The stuff that happened to me deserves to be in a prison. Covered in chains. At the bottom of the sea.

[metaphorically.]

[Lapis is silent for a moment as she carefully considers how to respond. there's a lot of buttons being pushed here, and she's not immediately certain how to address them. all of this is uncharted waters for her, as it were.

it's times like this that she really curses her mirror prison and everything it's stolen from her. she's certain that there was a time when she wouldn't be hesitant to navigate a simple conversation, when she'd have known when and how far to extend her kindness. all of that eroded over a war she never cared for.]

I don't mean it like that. It's more...deciding for yourself what limits you. Putting up the walls that you want, and having the key to let yourself out if anything changes.

You can't forget anything. You're just wasting your energy if you try.

[it's the closest thing to a purpose that Lapis has been able to find. at 'home' (ha) she may be trapped for the foreseeable future, but it's a situation that she willingly placed herself in. Steven's safety...that was something she was more than glad to imprison herself one last time for.

her hand had been clinging thoughtlessly to her arm ever since Terra had moved closer, but now it drops limply to her side. she smiles a little bit, but even though what she tacks on might be a joke it's hard to find any humor in it that isn't ironic.]

The ocean's better for holding people, anyway. Not thoughts.

Edited (and you deserve inbox spam anyway) 2015-05-01 00:07 (UTC)

Oh. That makes more sense. I've been... trying to do that in my off time.

["off time"? she's had three years of off time, forgotten underneath Jump City. even Beast Boy stopped visiting after long enough. he had to have stopped. otherwise he wouldn't have been so surprised to see her. great. another realization she hadn't come to until now. that's what she needed.]

It's just hard. I feel like... okay, you live a lot longer than humans do. So your recovery process is like an entire construction crew, and we've got one guy with a hammer and some plywood. We don't really know how to recover the right way, because we don't have time to do it right. We just kind of have to make what we can out of what we've got.

[she's been feeling increasingly bitter since this conversation started, and even though she knows that a lot of what she's saying isn't true, it feels that way. Slade used her. the Titans used her. everybody used her to make themselves feel better while saying they were trying to help her from the other side of their mouth. Tara is running dangerously close to telling Lapis more than anyone could need or want to know just by virtue of emotion alone. her fingernails start digging into her palms.]

God knows nobody else really wants to help you.

Living longer just means we have more time to hurt each other.

[thankfully Tara's angry possible outburst and Lapis' own hurtful memories receive a welcome distraction thanks to the arrival of the beach on the horizon. Lapis knows where to head for the seclusion both of them are probably going to need, and picks her way delicately across the sand. guess those bare feet come in handy for something.

she doesn't really speak until she finds the damp edge of the waves lapping up against the shore and crosses a few feet past it. she sits down, heedless of the wet sand or the guaranteed water biting at her clothes, opting instead to pull her knees up to her chest.

this was better. this was the comfort of power, she supposed. being close enough to a body of water so large that even the Crystal Gems couldn't have stopped her. it made things easier to swallow, no matter how ugly. maybe that was why it had been so easy to consign herself to Malachite.]

...I made a friend, in my world. He didn't understand anything, but he wanted to help. [she laughs, the sound half amazement at the recollection. poor, sweet Steven.]

And no matter what happened, he wouldn't stop trying. So...I guess I'm still trying for his sake.

[kill bill sirens]

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