CONFESSIONS MEME

[devoutish]

1. Post a comment with your character spilling their confessions and innermost thoughts for all to see
2. Go around and comment to other characters ICly, expressing shock, awe, disgust, anger, etc.
3. Discuss, accuse, commiserate, threadjack, etc.

Comments

font is totally on purpose btw

[restingstitchface]

The acknowledgement of my own fear was too frightening; denying it was a safer bet. I constantly refused offers of help and love because both demanded an acceptance of vulnerability. I was unable to cope with those who threatened to put a crack in the carefully controlled world I built for myself.

I will give you a story. My vengeance against somebody who had ruined the simulacrum of love she had offered. I had wanted love that wouldn't break me down and, in my rage, I lost, forgot, repressed, projected and attacked my own helplessness. To call it murder is perhaps not strong enough. Her death was a punishment. My revenge against the disturbing business of being a human being.

And here is where the present comes in. I still fear that I will lose control and the possibility my work will bring me any satisfaction. I take no pleasure in acknowledging that I will one day "fall off the wagon", as it were.

[pyrogue]

The trick about falling off the wagon is getting back on again. Just gotta keep climbing back on.

That fear won't go away though. Never does.

[restingstitchface]

You're not wrong.

About the second point. Would you mind explaining why I would want to climb back on in disgrace, though? What satisfaction is there in admitting you've chosen poorly?

[pyrogue]

Well, think about it the other way -- what kinda loser fails once and then immediately throws in the towel? Ain't nothing worth doing that didn't take effort.

[restingstitchface]

I hope you're not implying I'm a coward, Mr. Rory.

[pyrogue]

Not bravery you need, it's persistence.

[restingstitchface]

Oh. Then I can certainly attest to the fact I'm that. Ask Batman.

[sleight_of_hand]

...dammit, Crane.

[ Isn't this usually where you put #me? Or is it #relatable? ]

It never gets easy, but if you actually give a damn about changing for the better, you keep trying, no matter how many times you screw up.

[restingstitchface]

Dr. Crane.

And I don't care for changing everything about myself to meet your inferior standards. I'm simply making the attempt to keep you all happy because I know which side my bread's buttered, so to speak.

[sleight_of_hand]

Whatever.

And why the hell do you even care about the opinions of others?

[restingstitchface]

Because they impact on my work. Calculated risks, detective.

[itistolaugh]

Awwwwww, you need a hug? I'm gonna give you a hug.

[restingstitchface]

Don't you dare.

[itistolaugh]

I'm gonna doooo iiit! I'm gonna looooove yooouuu!

[restingstitchface]

[Grumble grumble what is this travesty?]

[itistolaugh]

You're into it 'cuz we are best friends.

[restingstitchface]

Associates.

[Keep your sociability away from him.]

[jeaniegrey]

I thought you were the type to condone letting go and losing control.

[restingstitchface]

I suppose you thought wrong.

[He is in some respects. It's complicated.]