etcelsior | KEMOSABE, JUMP ON IT!

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test drive

KEMOSABE, JUMP ON IT!

TEST DRIVE MEME

Considering apping into MASK OR MENACE? Want to dip your toes into the setting and get a feel of whether your character will fit into it? Or maybe you're just cruising and want to play around? Then you've come to the right place!

Pick any of the following scenarios below or feel free to make up your own, but don't be afraid to throw yourself at someone else's thread, either!

And remember there's only one rule in Test Drive Meme Club: have fun!

01. The city of Heropa is what one might expect from a small, bright and cheery place, where locals are friendly enough and local shop owners might offer a free drink to welcome you to their fair city. Some of the locals might thank you for always lending your service to the nation, while others might not say anything -- but if you have something nasty to say, better not say anything at all, right?

No matter how you feel about imPorts, there is one thing the community all must suffer through together: the weather. And time. Two, two things the community must suffer through together. However many things there are, today is celebrating the Dog Days of Summer. Literally. There is an adoption fair for every kind of dog you can imagine, and a few that really take imagination to call them ‘a dog.’ Like cats that have had doggy ear-shaped hats placed on their unwilling heads, or fish with decorative dog art painted on their bowl. Or that baby alligator on a leash with fur (glued? It looks glued) on its back. So while it’s a fine day to come and meet a new friend- or drop one off and run, hoping someone else will take it- it may also be a good day to stop the smaller animals and some wandering children from getting eaten by some of the more carnivorous creatures a few of the local eccentrics have decided to try to pawn off on the public. Or grab a snack from the fried food and ice cream stands and watch the madness. Whatever your choice, welcome to Florida, heroes.

02. De Chima, Virginia, is a large city with a healthy economy, and though it's quieter than Heropa, there are still large numbers of citizens to be awed at your very presence. Look at you! Organic wonder! Science and technology are the lifeblood of this city, so you're likely to come across a good many locals taking your picture with the newest of devices. The imPort craze remains high here, and you may find yourself cornered by overzealous imPort fans, media wannabes and opportunists alike, shoving cameras in your face. Their questions are likely to be fairly mundane, however; get ready for an interview about your taste in romantic partners, personal underwear choices, favorite foods, and more!

Wasn’t the forgiveness day festival wonderful? What, you weren’t in this world yet to attend? Well, never mind that! There’s still time for those willing to part with a few dollars to show your love for this new world and sympathy for the natives and imPorts alike that have been harmed in it. How? Why with a flower festival, of course! An entire block has been closed off for the seemingly endless sale of flowers of every shape and color. Technically, all the flowers have meanings and a few wandering guides are more than happy to help you pick out the bunch that may speak your true feelings to your intended target. It has all the potential to be a nice, sweet smelling day where you can express your love or eternal hatred or total ambivalence with living flora.

Of course, this is the science city. It can’t be something as simple as only normal, natural flowers. Some of the stands are nice enough to keep their technological wonders neatly labeled and separate from the rest of the foliage. Others aren’t so nice. The best way to get people to try a new thing is to spring it on an unsuspecting public, right? Right! Also for sale are roses that, if you prick your finger on the (oddly able to pierce through even superhuman strong, unbreakable skin) thorns you are compelled to spend the rest of the day with the first person you lay your eyes on. Never seen them before or hate their guts, it doesn’t matter. You simply feel awful when more than three feet away from them. To the point you will pass out if you’re away from them for more than five minutes. Hope you’re good at making quick bathroom runs.

There are also lilies that make birds flock to you and snap dragonsthat offer you supportive messages given in a squeaky voice every time you smell it. For those liking slightly more visibly engineered flowers, a multicolored daisy turns you into a Technicolor wonder, your clothes, hair, eyes, and skin changing rapidly from color to color without any apparent rhyme or reason (or respect for clashing). Putting the flower down will stop the changes, but you’re stuck in whatever random pattern it landed on until an hour passes and the effect wears off. Good luck with the festival!

03. Maurtia Falls, Pennsylvania has had its ups and downs since imPorts started reappearing. Several imPort heroes have put focused efforts into cleaning up the streets of this somewhat infamous city, while others have swooped in to help the criminal industry thrive. More so here than the streets of any other imPort city, the battle between good and evil looks more like a war of escalation than a heroic tale. That might make the less than warm welcome imPorts are given in the city a little more understandable. The emergence of locals with superpowers is hardly helping. While some of these individuals have turned to crime, many locals seem more inclined to defend their native powered drug dealer than help the non-native hero bring them to justice. Who are you to tell them how to live?

To say all is not right in the streets of Maurtia Falls is to more or less state the obvious, but this time, the criminal nature of this foe is a little... sillier than usual. One gentleman gifted with the powers of superspeed seems not to have grasped the true potential of his powers and instead of spending his time robbing banks or big businesses, he's decided to be the world's most efficient pickpocket. He zips through the street, pushing people over at superspeed and picking their pockets and snatching their pockets, leaving only a brown blur in his wake, evidently having lost the memo that primary colours are all the rage for costumed heroes and villains.
The more heroically minded among you may want to go after this villain or save a grandma or two that have been unintentionally pushed straight into traffic... but the guy has to stop to rest sometime, and he's really begging for a beatdown with this kind of behaviour.

04. Nonah, North Carolina, is the liveliest of all cities; loud, busy and there's some kind of energy in the air that gets everyone buzzing with excitement. To be American is to be part of a melting pot, and that there's more money to be made by the thriving local industries hardly hurts. Natives may gather around new arrivals and ask both personal and broad questions about life as an imPort, what they are looking forward to, what their favorite article of underwear is. A few night clubs offer free entrance - just this once!

Today the word on everyone’s lips is branding. It’s not enough to slap on some spandex or hand stitch a mask these days. That’s so 80s. Now is the time not only to get your hero/villain costume professionally made, it’s time for sponsorship! Why should natives be limited to just having some registered imPorts actually working at their place of business? A cape is basically a big, open banner just waiting for a logo. Or ten. Now, they can’t really promise money up front for anyone agreeing to wear their logo and work their slogan into a witty quip during an arrest, but they can do one better: free products. Get all the free socks you can wear by only fighting crime in Jane’s Honey of the Earth socks, underwear, and bras. Or negotiate for free dinners for life if you wear the logo and agree to only appear on dates eating at Overweigh burger shack.

Of course, there’s nothing like an unlikely team up to really get the media spotlight on an imPort (and the brand they now represent). If you fall for the hype or even just get herded over to an audition station (if you are walking down the road today, chances are you’re going to get unwillingly pulled in at least once), get ready to meet your new partner: this random stranger! The company will give you 10 minutes to get to know each other, then it’s time to grin, bear it, and think of the free merchandise as they ask you to perform at least one heroic feat as a team for their cameras. What that is, exactly, is up to you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Italy. Though really, I don't see why that should matter at all.

And if what you say is true, you should tell me something interesting.

[ 'cause who knows you might just be a LYING LIAR ]

[It doesn't really, so much as it just further confirms suspicions. Good grief. He really hopes this kid doesn't know the name "Jotaro Kujo" or he's going to have to deal with... well something he feels isn't right to just spring on someone by his sheer presence alone.]

A rat almost killed me once.

[ rather flatly, ]

That's not impressive, that's just foolish. I'm not interested in hearing your flaws.

It shot flesh melting bullets that nearly destroyed my body.

[""Nearly"" as if it didn't like destroy half his body until his uncle fixed him.]

[ alright, that's interesting. you're forgiven. the hostilities will be at a ceasefire until giorno sees fit to attack again. ]

- better. How did you kill it?

[ he will be very disappointed if he were proven wrong about this assumption. ]

I didn't. [He could say he did it and Giorno wouldn't know different, but Jotaro is too honest to conceive the notion of lying about that.] I used myself as a diversion to draw it out to the open, so that someone else could kill it.

[ smart. he'll have to file that for use later. it'll come in handy in the future, he knows it. ]

Anything else?

[the time one of his best friends tried to kill him, the time an orangutan tried to kill him, the time he almost drowned under the sea, getting turned into an eight year old for a hot second, then also the time he killed a vampire who nearly killed him............]

Not exciting enough for you?

[ all of the above. none of the above. giorno gives him a thin smile. ]

I want to know what's worth stopping a horticulturist from a daily stroll.

Apparently a man who likes to use himself for bait has questions and a wealth of stories behind him. That's fine, I can't say it's not interesting. But there are better places to be, and yet here we are.

[...Good grief. If all the other information he had on hand didn't already tell him what he knows, this kid's attitude would certainly make him bat an eye. He's definitely his father's son in at least one way so far.]

Do you have a better place to be? I wouldn't grab you by the arm if you walked.

[ yare yare yourself.

there is, however, one thing that nags him. before they started talking, he told him he saw him make the tree. ever since he's arrived here, stands weren't something special to anyone involved; there are better and more bizarre powers out there and that's just in the span of his very short trip all over. he is beset by a curiosity to keep asking everyone if they've seen his stand even if the answer for his question is more or less just an affirmative. repeating himself wouldn't be necessary, really, even if the urge is there. he bites his tongue on that.

he offers options. mista would probably tell him he's a changed man should he hear the change in tone, but whatever, he's not here. he can do what he wants. ]

If you're a local, I'm taking suggestions. I might even ask for company. We can start on better terms.

If what you want is a fight, I'm busy. [ taps his wrist as if to say he's got a non-existent 3pm appointment with clara or something. ] Furthermore, I'm going to win, so the challenge itself is useless.

[ he's got no idea if he's going to accept the latter, but he'll pre-empt that just in case. ]

[Wow the arrogance is stunning. Dio never got a chance to raise his son, probably didn't even know he had one, but that goddamn line is out of the classic bullshit handbook that he's stunned for a moment.]

I have no intention of fighting you. Not now or ever. [While he must evaluate what sort of person Giorno is for himself, he has on good authority that the boy is not like his father. That's good enough for him really.] However, I own a business located here so I'm quite often in town. Does that make me 'local' enough?

That's local enough for me.

[ is it even arrogance if it's just facts? before he'd come here, giorno had passione in his hands. as far as he's concerned ....

in any case, he is not in his own turf, and certain concessions have to be made - like being at the mercy of strangers, again, except this time he knows who he is, and somehow that's a comfort. ] What kind of business?

A nightclub. It's an old school sort of place, mostly catering to wealthier sorts and those who enjoy jazz.

[ that sounds like it'll be an okay-ish venue for a fifteen year old, so giorno nods. ]

Then, in that case, I'll gladly take your offer.

Lead the way.

[Whoa back up boy.]

How old are you?

[Yeah he's gonna be that way.]

I'm eighteen.

[ YOU'RE NOT MY DAD ]

[no but he is your..................... great-grandnephew? god fuck this family tree.

anyway he snorts because wow that's bullshit.]

Good grief. You won't be allowed to drink.

I'm Italian.

[ like that explains anything. at the risk of already sounding his age, he adds, rather grudgingly: ] I will settle for a cappuccino.

Sorry, you're in the United States now. Dreadful, I know.

[he waves and starts walking toward the club. won't be more than a five minute walk from where they are before they're at the front door. the club is closed and shuttered during the day (despite it's look, this still is maurtia falls) and he instead leads giorno down an alley so they can go through a locked side-door for EMPLOYEES ONLY.]

The staff isn't in besides the cleaners, so you'll have to settle for me making it.

[ america, so that means .... he has to be 21 before he touches a drop of wine. people have been crucified for less.

in any case, as they're not going to fight, giorno walks with a little less edge to him as they make their way to the club, which is more or less a decent-looking place and he appreciates how it looks all the same.

jotaro makes a throw-away comment as they walk in, so giorno makes his own as well: ]

Just don't piss in the cup.

[ is he serious? is he joking? who knows. ]

...

There's a story to that and I'm not going to ask for it.

[just...........

The door opens them up to a maintenance room, and outside is a broad hallway that leads to the main floor. The lights are already on, as scattered members of the cleaning staff are around wiping tables and vacuuming the rugged floor of the dining area. They turn their head up to him when they hear someone come in, but promptly go back to work when they recognize it's just him and not some stranger busting in. Jotaro leads Giorno to the bar area, which he goes behind and ushers the boy to sit in front of.]

You'll have to forgive me if it isn't up to your tastes. I drink my coffee black.

[ giorno just shrugs. ] If it's on the house, I'll accept it.

[ the bar's nice. it's got a cool vibe that allows people to relax, and giorno's willing to bet that it's probably not a bad place to be seen. this guy here's like the bar keep and owner he's seen in movies or in a hemingway novel. giorno leans against the bar, watching jotaro as he makes him his cappucino. ]

Are you normally this charitable? Or am I a special case?

[He goes through the motions of preparing the espresso machine first, wondering how much he should say. Upfront and honest is normally his style, because he has no patience for word games and being strung along. Yet with Giorno it's not an easy situation to explain. He isn't sure if he'll say something that would make the boy walk out. That could be bad, because he knows Dio will chase after Giorno the second he realizes the boy is in this world. And, well, there are two sides to the story.]

I would say you're special. [Let's start with that.] The reason as to why... I wonder what you think about that.

So you have the advantage. But to ask me as to why ....?

[ giorno says serenely, fingers tapping against the surface in a light drumming sound as he considers, briefly, how much should he say in reply to that. after all, he knows something that giorno doesn't, and just what the extent of that knowledge is, is something he needs to find out.

he may not like word games and being strung along, but that was entirely giorno. not too different from the tree it gently sauntered downwards from. ]

There needs to be no 'why'. I am Giorno Giovanna. I am always a matter of interest.

To the extent that you say I'm special, and to all the curiousities that come with it ... the difference in what we both know is a matter of depth.

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