etcelsior | FORCED HONESTY

I owe you a lot more than this.

[sHIT FUCKING DAMN THIS IS WAY LESS FUN ON THE OTHER SIDE]

How was I supposed to know you were gonna be a kinky weirdo, though? I don't think this is fair!

You met my old man, you shoulda seen this coming. Hell, I shoulda seen it coming.

[...like, really.]

The hell else do you think you owe me for, though?

I'm pretty sure we were both hoping he was some kind of creepy fucking outlier.

[she was, at the very least. but! unfortunately that second question isn't one that she can avoid the way she's been skating around the initial one. suddenly the ground is the most fascinating object she's seen in a while.]

...everything.

I dunno, I gave him a lot of grief for the way he dressed, but I gotta hand it to him. He could really pull it off, y'know?

Anyway...

You know I don't do stuff for you because I want anything in return, right? You don't really owe me anything. I just like seeing you happy. You deserve it.

I know you're not looking for anything...'s why I wanna give you everything. You're busting your ass when I'm just fucking happy whenever you're around. I don't want you to think you're not good enough.

[one.]

But you already have given me everything...

It's not enough. My best's not enough compared to everyone else.

What are you even talking about? There's no one else who makes me feel like I never left home. That's all you, Hazel. I feel like I've known you my whole life. It doesn't get better than that.

...I never said it wasn't dumb as shit.

[ugh, this honesty. she's glad she can at least choose when to keep her mouth shut, because otherwise? everything Josuke just said would have her gushing completely unprompted. bad enough that it feels like someone just dropped liquid metal in the cavity that used to house her stomach.]

I always feel like I'm not enough no matter what it's about. I'm just not used to it fucking mattering.

[which is, in her own oblique way, an admission that sometimes she wants to see him keep smiling more than she hates herself.]

It's not dumb.

You got no idea how much I wish I could introduce you to everyone back home. Or how much they'd love you as much as I do.

That's a nice thought, but I don't think anyone could love me as much as you do, Josuke.

I'm inclined to disagree. You're pretty lovable. Anyone tries to love you the way I do, though...there's gonna be trouble.

[Namely him acting like a huge baby about it.]

What're you gonna do, throw a tantrum on my living room floor?

...probably.

[Ugh.]

[UGLY LAUGHTER]

You're super lucky I think that's cute as fuck, I hope you know that.

How's that lucky!

Because it always makes me want to kiss you after.

O-oh. Yeah, okay. That's pretty lucky, then...

[AND AS IF THAT WASN'T MORTIFYING ENOUGH SHE JUST KEEPS TALKING]

Although...sometimes I kinda hope you actually deck a guy over me some day.

I already did.

Just not for this reason...

Who the fuck's dumb enough to get you to do that for any reason?

[Hazel is literally the worst catalyst for a fight she can possibly think of.]

It's not a question of dumb, shit just kind of...happened. And when I found out about it, I reacted.

I'm not actually proud of it. I mean, I'd do anything to defend you, but...

[He shrugs.]

Punching a friend in the face isn't something you boast about.

[she honestly can't think of any friend of Josuke's who'd be involved in anything with her that would get that reaction...and that's a little scary.

inexplicably she wants to apologize. but that's stupid and her self-hatred talking, and for once she manages to bite down on it before it gets past her lips.]

...it'll be somebody hitting on me next time, alright? You can talk that up for weeks after.

[part of her wants to ask who, why, how...but another part isn't sure she wants to know.]

[He'd rather she didn't ask who specifically, because he'd rather not have to tell her about hitting Kaneki. He meant it when he said he wasn't proud of how he'd reacted, even if it had been because of what had happened to her. There were better ways to handle things than violence, he's always maintained that...even if sometimes his emotions get the better of him and he lashes out.

Though, at least with Ken they'd talked things out afterwards. But that didn't erase that his initial response had been to throw a fist first and ask questions later.

Definitely not a shining moment.]

...hm, has there been anyone hitting on you I need to worry about?

[Apologies, girlfriendo. He has to change the subject, and this is the next best thing.]

You're never gonna need to worry about that. Buuut we can make someday up if you need an excuse to get jealous.

[she can't play along as well as she normally would because her this god damn honesty, but Hazel's happy to do her best for him. no one knows better about not wanting to discuss shameful moments than her.]

(no subject)

unbreaker - 2016-07-29 07:07 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

deadtective - 2016-07-29 07:24 (UTC) - Expand